The Ackerman Project
by Kotama
Summary: Sometimes life has to be taken into your own hands. Sometimes there isn't a hero to save the different would things be if Mikasa wasn't saved? Different hardships may be in store, but could she also learn more about herself? Who is she? Who was she supposed to be? What is the meaning behind the Ackerman name?


**Title: **The Ackerman Project

**Summary: **Sometimes life has to be taken into your own hands. Sometimes there isn't a hero to save the different would things be if Mikasa wasn't saved? Different hardships may be in store, but could she also learn more about herself? Who is she? Who was she supposed to be? What is the meaning behind the Ackerman name?

**Story Notes: **

1. This is with the knowledge I possess of SnK up to chapter 57. Any revelations later on may not be incorporated as I already have a solid grasp on the storyline for this fanfiction.

2. Appearances are going by the manga…So if you have only watch the anime and comment that someone doesn't look that way—well, I want to say I'll ignore it but I will probably correct you, frustrating us both. Examples of different character appearances consist (but is no way limited to) Petra and Eren.

3. This story is written with the premise that Mikasa Ackerman wasn't saved the day her parents die. The rest of the twists are the fun writing bits I'm coming up with to fill unanswered questions in the series or sometimes just changing things to make this story interesting.

4. I will be spelling Hanji Zoe as… well Hanji. I'm sorry if you prefer the English spelling but the romanization is just something I prefer because whenever I see Hange, my mind always processes it differently than how it's pronounce. That being said, Levi will be the English Romanization.

5. Now that I brought up Hanji, it should be noted Hanji will always be indicated neutrally. The anime portrays her as a girl but Isayama never indicated a gender for Hanji and even told his editor and posted on twitter that Hanji's gender is open to interpretation. I'm keeping Hanji neutral because I don't care either way. Hanji is Hanji and that's why Hanji is one of my favourite characters—the gender doesn't really matter to me

6. Hopefully this is all the story notes, so I never have to write another one.

**Warnings:**

1. It's rated M for a reason. This is Shingeki no Kyojin—meaning there are plenty of deaths, gruesome, and perturbing scenes. Enough said.

2, There may (will) be spoilers! Or at the very least references to spoilers.

* * *

Chapter One: Abjure

* * *

_Year 844—Outskirts of Shinganshina District, Wall Maria—Ackerman Household_

The world was infinitesimal to her. She lived with her parents, helped care for their ample garden (they grew most of their food), helped gather wood, and other menial chores. Being a bit away from the city meant she didn't have neighbours or other children to play with. Her contact was usually limited to her parents.

Her name is Mikasa Ackerman.

Her small world and childhood innocence led her to implicitly trust her parents. It was why she was currently holding back screams as her mother inscribed an insignia onto her lower forearm, just above her wrist. Her eyes watered, but with all her might, she stopped herself from weeping with her mother in front of her and her father in the room too. Whose clan symbol was this anyway? Was it her mom's because she was an oriental? Or was it from her dad's side—but that hardly made sense. Her dad never spoke of his family, so the insignia must be from her mother's side…right?

She felt the pressure from the carving tools leave her arm, but a new throbbing pain replace the former agony. Her mother wrapped the bandages to conceal the fresh markings. It wouldn't be sanitary to leave it uncovered.

Mikasa closed her eyes and held her covered arm. She would not let the pain get to her.

"Uh…It hurts." In the end, she couldn't keep it to herself. The pain centred on the engravings, but the pain also extended up the nerves in the arm. It was hardly tolerable.

Her mother merely smiled. The pride on her mother showed made Mikasa not say anymore on the subject. "Taken like a champ, Mikasa. Good. This is the symbol of our clan which we have to pass down. When you have children of your own, you'll give it to them too."

Mikasa didn't want to talk about the apparent family "heirloom" anymore, so she decided to change the course of the conversation. She asked how children were made. It was enough to fluster her parents, and she went without an answer.

There was a knock on the door and her dad eagerly approached the door. They had been waiting on Dr. Jäger.

There was an odd sound as her father's greetings were cut short. Mikasa twisted her body to see what happened. Her eyes widened at the sight. Blood. Her father's corpse fell to the ground. She should have looked away, but her eyes were drawn to him. Her mind flickered back to the bugs feasting on each other and her dad with animals he hunted and brought home. Her mind couldn't comprehend the scene in front of her though. Life was supposed to be peaceful, wasn't it? Humans were intended to have fulfilled lives and get along with each other, weren't they? So why…?

Her attention remained on her dad as her mom instinctually grabbed one of the tools she had previously used on her daughter. She charged at the three men and cried frightened.

It only alerted the men of her attack. One man managed to hit Mikasa's mother in the neck with an axe just as Mikasa had been able to force herself to look in her mom's direction.

It was a cursed day. It began with her own anguish, and now it followed to her parents' deaths. She wanted this to be a nightmare. She didn't want to believe this was reality. It was all too cruel. The world was just too cruel!

She'd be foolish to think they would stop with her parents. She would be next. Her wide, frightened eyes never shifted away from the three men. She took a step back as they entered her home. There was nowhere to run.

"Idiot! We only had to kill the man. She was an oriental, the other one. A full one too," said one of the men.

Another man back up the first man as they all continued to approach her. "Yeah, now all we got is a half-oriental. And a kid no less. Hardly appealing."

"It's not my fault! She attacked me."

"It don't matter. Even if she isn't your type, she still is half-oriental—and a girl ,nonetheless. We should be able to find someone willing to buy her in the underground of Sina."

"There better be. After going through this trouble, we deserve some cash."

Mikasa's half-hearted struggles were nothing compared to the strength of three grown men. She was still trying to come to term that her parents had been murdered and that she witnessed it. One went for her legs, one for her arms, and one for her mouth. The ropes were tight and irritable and the cloth gagging her was awkward and uncomfortable—not that her comfort was even taken into consideration considering the circumstances.

"Oi, looks like she's got an injury."

"Can't anything go right?

"It's probably just a scratch. It won't matter. We can hide it."

The man tying her wrists together untied her bandages, letting it fall to the ground.

"What the hell?!"

"What the hell's wrong now?"

"Are you sure she's oriental? This is more than a scratch. It fuckin' looks likes she been branded."

"I thought you researched this family before we came here, Benjamin! Who's gonna want some marked child?"

Mikasa didn't listen into the conversation until they undid her wrappings. The fresh mark still hurt. She was confused. They were looking for Orientals? Or maybe just anyone they could sell. But she couldn't help but feel her lifeline drain from her when they commented on the insignia. It was for her mother's clan. It was why she endured the pain. But no, if they "knew" Orientals then they would have come across this marking before—or at least the marking of whatever clan they came from. Maybe it really was from her father's side. But that couldn't be. He never spoke of his family.

Now that she thought of it, she had never met any other family aside from her parents. No aunts, nor uncles, no grandparents, nor cousins.

Tears pricked her eyes as the men roughly guided her to their horse and wagon. They threw her on the wagon, mostly concealed by other good on it, before covering the wagon with cloth which wasn't uncommon. She couldn't hold back her emotions anymore. Tears cascaded down her face, the gag preventing her from making any sounds.

She was terrified. She was confused. She was distraught. She didn't know what to believe. She was still in shock to watching her parents murdered and wanted her cathartic moment, yet that wasn't possible.

What would happen now? Her mind wandered. Her thoughts flickering between her parents, her insignia, the three men, her memories, and nothingness.

The ride was rough. Her body slid and bounced due to the terrain. At the speed they were going, they would probably be in Wall Rose by nightfall. That is, if they didn't make any stops.

By nightfall, they had made it inside Wall Rose. Mikasa had never been within any wall aside from Wall Maria. She couldn't see what it was like from where she currently was, though. She could hear some chatter, but that was all. She was weak and hungry. Her head hurt as well. If it was from a headache or from the never ending cycle of thoughts crossing her brain, she didn't know.

The men fed the horses before going into an inn for the evening, but not before securing her. The last thing they wanted was to be caught or lose her.

The cold night air (she was wearing a sleeveless dress) and hard wood made it hard for her to fall asleep. When she finally did fall asleep, it was hardly a few hours before she awoke from her nightmare. She tried to go back to sleep, being awake just allowed her to consciously think of her nightmares, but she had little success. It was a long night before morning came and the three men returned to make their way into Wall Sina.

The trip, once again, was less than enjoyable. The thought to escape once crossed her mind, but she dismissed it. How could she unbind herself? Where would she go? There was no longer a home to go to. It would take a week of constant walking to make it back—and that house held her parents' bloodied corpses—and there wasn't anyone she could turn to. She was all alone in the cruel world.

…Yet she didn't want to follow these men. She didn't want to be sold. She was a human being and wanted to be treated like one.

She would have been fine with a modest, boring life. It could have been uneventful, but it could have been a safe life.

But would she hide behind the ugly truth or hide behind the lies of distant youth?

She still hadn't reached a conclusion when they arrived in Sina around dinner time. When the cover was finally removed, she noticed the sun was beginning to set. She chose to focus on that to ignore the cruel expressions on the men's faces. They were in an alley. No one was going to come and saviour. Maybe in the cruel world there weren't saviours. Maybe those were only more lies in _happy _fairy tales.

"Now we're gonna untie you, and you're gonna behave."

Mikasa remained emotionless and the men found amusement in her apparent apathy.

"C'mon. At least smile. You can be as lifeless as you want after. You can even kill yourself if you want." They just wanted the money.

They undid her bindings.

Two led the way into the underground society, the third walking next to her. It was disgusting how none of them were surprised. Only a few gave a glance to her. It must have been normal for people to be sold down here. Not one person was going to save her or even speak on her behalf. Some ignored her; she got some pitiful looks; some eyed her up, but none would come to her rescue.

They were headed to a lower level. It was time for her to make a choice. Would she follow along? Or would she be the one to fight for her freedom?

It took longer for her to decide than it should have, but, nevertheless, she was Mikasa. She didn't know how much of her life was lies, but she would never know anything other than lies if she gave up now. If she followed them, her life was as good as over—and she wanted to live.

Her quick perception eyed the knife in a holster on the hip of the man standing next to her. In a quick fluid motion she grabbed the knife, startling the man who thought her to be impassive. As he turned to face his captive, he was stabbed in the heart by said girl. Startled at how quick and easy she found the act, she left the knife in his chest before running the way she had come from. Again, those nearby didn't stop her from escaping nor checked to see if the man was alive or not. His two friends had checked on him first, but he had already died and Mikasa had already gained enough distant to escape. They profanities echoed, though, reaching her ears.

* * *

Mikasa's running had been off, due to her immobility for the past 48 hours. She had tripped and caught herself a few times, also bumping into a few things since she couldn't travel linearly, but she had managed to escape.

Inside Wall Sina was different than Wall Maria. Much different. Even the atmosphere was different. She didn't fit in but had nowhere to go. The wind blew giving her shivers. Reluctantly she found a few trash cans in another alley and started searching through them. She needed something to stay warm. She managed to find a hat. It was a few sized too big, had a hole in it, and looked ready to tear even more, but she put it on anyway. She also found a stained sheet and a pin. It was odd, but she wasn't doing it for the fashion.

She looked down at her exposed arm. She didn't know what to make of it, but she didn't like looking at it. She ripped a part of the sheet-made -cloak to wrap her arm with. It wasn't clean and it might infect her arm, but she didn't have much choice. She had nothing. She was already starving with no food.

Life was cruel, Mikasa surmised. However, she wasn't going to let it get the best of her. She was a survivor and she intended to keep it that way.

* * *

_Yeah, personally I think this chapter is a little boring, but I needed to write it for the set up for everything else. The next chapter will start with Mikasa's living conditions/life living on the streets of Sina._


End file.
